Thursday, July 17, 2014

The Facebook

Here it is. The post where I tear a few people a new one discuss appropriate vs inappropriate Facebook posts/conversations. The motivation behind this post is due to recent posts by people I am strongly considering 'unfriending' on my own Facebook page and to the research I'm doing for a school newsletter.

Some of these I mention for the sake of safety. Even though you have your privacy settings, you just never know who is really going to see what you put out there. AND, once it is out there, IT IS out there. No take backs.

Other things I mention for the sake of pointing out stupidity. Because, apparently, people do not understand what they are posting makes people know for a fact that the person posting this stuff IS stupid. Of course, there are a couple that are nothing more than personal opinion.

Things people should NOT post via Facebook:

Personal Drama. Keep your drama OFF the Facebook. This is no place for people to air their dirty laundry. For example, if you've just gotten out of jail, that's something to keep to yourself. I really don't think it's something to broadcast on Facebook.

Relationship Drama. Again, this is inappropriate. No one wants to read the argument or making up between two people in a romantic relationship. No one wants to see the gushy stuff either. Keep this between the two of you. Please.

Bathroom Selfies. This one should not even have to be discussed. It should be abundantly CLEAR that we do NOT post selfies taken in the bathroom. That's just stupid. And gross. If you do, do NOT be surprised if people comment in a negative manner. You sort of walk right into that when you post stupid things on the Facebook.

Naked Pix of any kind. Sadly, this isn't self explanatory. Even if it's partial nudity, NOBODY WANTS TO SEE IT. Cover up people. Again, don't complain if you do it and get negative or crude comments.

Broadcast the problems of other people. Seriously, I don't care who it is or what your relationship is to them, it's NOT YOUR BUSINESS TO BROADCAST. This happened just the other day when someone posted something about one of her family members on a friend's timeline FOR ALL TO SEE. That's right. When it's posted on a friend's timeline, that friend is not the only one who sees it. Really stupid.

Personal information. To much personal information posted on Facebook can cause you some big trouble down the road. I know a woman older than I who put her phone number on a friend's Facebook timeline. Which means it showed up on mine and many others. Dumb ass thing to do.

Vacation plans. Unless, of course, you want it to get out that no one will be at your house and that it would be a great time for someone to go over there and rob you. Post about your vacation upon your return. When you're tired and grumpy enough that no one would dare come near your house.

Location. Again, posting your current location tells potential thieves that you are not at home and they should run over right away to rob you.

Pictures of your kids/grandkids tagged with their names. Seriously. This is not safe. It gives a potential perve a name to use. 

Political opinions. This just makes you sound opinionated and judgmental and can come across as trying to bully others into believing as you do. Share your political views with those who want to hear them but most of us on Facebook couldn't care less. If you want to put this stuff out there, make a page for your political views. Or just follow your favorite politicians and comment. A lot. 

On a related note, Your Religion/Religious Views. I'm so glad other people have them. I have them too. But no one who doesn't know me personally knows what they are. I don't shove my views down the throats of others and I wish they would return the favor.

Anything that could work against you when applying for or keeping a job. Duh. We could even extend this to include anything that anyone could use against you for any reason. 

Negativity. I am SICK of hearing negativity people post about their jobs or relationships or just in general because they are negative people. Stop it. NOW. Hate the job? Get a new one. Or at least spend time searching for a better one instead of sharing nothing but negativity about the one they do have. Unless it's got humor. If it's just something being said because it's funny, I'm down with that. How can you tell? Because you laugh and because those people aren't constantly/consistently posting negativity. Same deal with relationships. I tend to see the people in this category as attention seekers who love to host pity parties.

Ills and ailments. I seriously DO NOT want to hear about someone's diarrhea. I don't want to hear about that hospital stay and what they did, step by step, to them while they were there. If there's a serious illness someone is battling and they want to post for friends and family, make a page. That will be a good place for people, who are into hearing all that stuff, to go and catch up/keep up with them. OR use a private message or make it an event for people to choose whether or not to see it. I find most of these folks to be attention seekers too.

Drunk Posts. Seriously. Don't do this. It's a really STUPID thing to do. This includes pix for obvious reasons.

The Games. Don't post about the games you're playing and ask people for lives. We don't like that. At all.

Gossip. It's not nice and you could get sued for defamation of character.  

Things that are ok to post via Facebook:

Good news. It's ok to share good news- a new job, new addition, new relationship, etc. As long as we aren't shoving it in someone's face. Motivation behind the action, people. Motivation.

Humor. If you possess it. If not, there are tons of pages to 'Like' out there that provide clever quips and humor for you! Plus, most of us need a laugh every day! This should never be done in a mean-spirited manner. Check that motivation.

Congratulations. It's great when people offer congratulations and that's fine on Facebook. We all need a pat on the back from time to time.

Celebrations. Everyone appreciates and enjoys a good celebration- birthdays, weddings, etc. Just be careful of the pictures and the tagging of said pictures.

Non-embarrassing pictures. Those that you don't mind people seeing. Be careful posting pictures of others. Make sure they don't mind being tagged and DO NOT tag their kids.

Words of encouragement. This is not a bad thing to post on Facebook either when it's something like "You can do it!" or "You've got this!"  But I don't think it should be done to the level of exposing someone's private business as to why you're offering the encouragement.

Weather updates. I know this sounds weird and uninteresting. But our family has a friend who works for the National Weather Service (or did- retired) and, because we live in an area affected by hurricanes, I loved and appreciated it when he posted hurricane updates.

PR for friends. This is usually fine as long as the friend or family member doesn't mind. For example, a lot of us at school are promoting our friend's brand new book coming out this month. It's her very first one! (Interested? CLICK HERE).

Team support. Have a favorite sports team? Go ahead and cheer for them on Facebook. But don't get something started with a fan of a rival team. That probably won't end well. Unless it's all in good fun.

Appreciation for others. I like to do this on occasion just because I have some friends that are so wonderful that I want everyone to know how great these people are. If they don't like it, just take it down.

Great Recipes. YES, please! I'm always up for a new one or a remake of an old one or whatever is out there to be shared!

Just remember: anything you post to social media can and will be used against you in one way or another and you could end up paying dearly for it.

Ok, then, it's your turn to add to the list! Tell me what I left out and let's get this list out there for the poor souls who need it. Desperately. LOL


  1. You are dean on with this post.These things seem pretty self explanatory to me. Crazy world! Hope all is good in your world. Wendell sends a hug. :)

  2. I'm totally with you on this one, and I don't think you've left anything out, great job ! :)

  3. And this why I don't post on FB anymore. Thanks for the great post..Blessings

  4. Now I will have to go look at my own timeline and see what I have posted. Since I rarely post anything, I am sorry if I posted something that came across to you.
    I never thought about that. Thanks.
    I have thought about not having face book too, very often.
    Lots of good stuff here Pam. I can see how you have thought about it.

  5. As someone involved in HR decisions, I can tell you that the first thing I do when we receive a qualified applicant, for a vacancy, is to see what is on-line about them. I check FB, Linked-In, and Google them for anything else that might be posted. Found an arrest record one time...

    As for naming our grandchildren, they are adults (or nearly) and have their own facebook pages. Little ones - different story.

    Good post!!

  6. Patrice- First, give Wendell a hug right back from me! And then have him give you one! :) I thought that stuff was common sense too but, apparently, I was wrong. LOL

    Alessandra- Thanks!

    Linda- Thank you!

    Kim- You never offend anyone. Never. Ever. You are always positive and encouraging! :)

    Terri- Oh geez. Who posts that they've been in jail? Oh yeah, one of my stupid relatives. LOL Yeah, the little bits don't need their names out there.


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