Wednesday, January 19, 2011

A Typical Day in a Life… Ruled by the Dog

 If you decide to invite a sweet little doggie into your empty nest, your daily life might go something like mine:

5:00- comment to self, Crap, it’s 5:00

Tucker looking out study window
5:15- get up for quiet blog time

6:00- listen to Hub’s alarm

6:15- listen to Hub’s alarm

6:30- listen to Hub’s alarm; listen to Hubs make his morning noises as he heads for bathroom which I can hear clearly even though I’m on the other side of the house (in his defense, it is a small house); make fresh juice in our awesome juicer for Hubs

6:45- tell Hubs to drink fresh juice made in our awesome juicer since I did go through the trouble to make it.

7:00- Make sure he has his lunch and tell Hubs good-bye; clean up our awesome juicer mess

7:05- get dressed for the day

7:10- ask Tucker if he wants to go out; go to computer for some blog reading time while waiting for it to warm up enough to take Tucker for a walk; get stared at by Tucker until time to go for a walk.

8:00- tired of waiting for it to warm up and getting stared at by a dog, take Tucker for a walk.

9:00-9:30- come back from walking Tucker and let him out in back yard to scout for squirrels; replenish bird seed if needed

Tucker begging squirrel to come down
9:30- feed Tucker; prepare and eat my breakfast

9:45- start laundry if needed; let Tucker out to chase squirrels; begin cleaning up

9:50- stop cleaning and let Tucker back in house

10:00- stop cleaning and let Tucker out to chase squirrels; check feeders for birds; take pictures if feasible

10:10- stop cleaning and let Tucker back in house

10: 30- stop cleaning and let Tucker out to chase squirrels; check feeders for birds; take pictures if feasible

10:45- stop cleaning and let Tucker back in house to chase and bark at vacuum cleaner

11:00- put vacuum cleaner away and let Tucker out to chase the stupid squirrels; more blog time

11:15- stop blogging and let Tucker back in house

11:30- stop blogging and let Tucker out to chase the dang squirrels; check feeders for birds; take pictures if feasible; wonder when Hubs is going to install a doggie door like he said he would. 

11:45- stop blogging and let Tucker back in house

Squirrel saying, "Hell to the no!"
12:00- lunch

12:30- let Tucker out to chase those annoyingashell squirrels

12:45- let Tucker back in house

1:00- let Tucker out to chase freaking squirrels; wonder why Hubs even bothers to say he will do something if he’s not going to do it; Wii Fit time


1:15- stop Wii Fit to let Tucker back in house

1:30- stop Wii Fit to let Tucker out to chase damn squirrels; considering if, perhaps, the reason Hubs has not installed doggie door he said he was going to install is because letting the dog in and out all day long does not affect him at all.  

1:45- stop Wii Fit to let Tucker back in house

2:00- reward myself with a game or two of Wii bowling; let Tucker out to chase the squirrels; wonder how to go about acquiring gun for squirrels

2:15- Let Tucker back in house; check email

2:30-stop checking email and let Tucker out to chase squirrels; wonder if people still eat squirrel stew; return to emails

2:45- stop checking email and let Tucker back in house; resume checking emails

3:00-read any new blog posts; stop reading new blog posts and let Tucker out to chase squirrels while informing Tucker I am sick and tired of letting him in and out of the house to chase the damn squirrels

3:45-resume reading blog posts; stop reading blog posts and let Tucker back in house

4:00-Give up on reading blog posts, begin knitting neck warmer for Deanie, stop knitting and let Tucker out to chase squirrels with a huge SIGH; resume knitting

4:15-stop knitting and let Tucker back in house; resume knitting

4:30-stop knitting to let Tucker out to chase squirrels; pondering the possibility of withholding sex until the doggie door is installed; resume knitting

4:45-stop knitting to let Tucker back in house; resume knitting

5:00-stop knitting to begin preparing dinner; wonder why Tucker doesn’t want to go out

5:15-let Tucker out to chase squirrels; thank God it’s almost over for today

5:30-clean up kitchen while dinner is cooking; let Tucker in house; play ball with Tucker

6:00- finish cleaning kitchen while Tucker naps

6:30- Hubs gets mauled by and plays ball with Tucker

7:00- dinner

7:30- clean up kitchen; stop cleaning up to let Tucker out to bark at possum that Hubs said he would get rid of; listen to Hubs say, “I've got to get out there and get rid of that possum.” (Ya think?)

7:45- let Tucker back in house; BLOG time

8:30- stop Blog time; let Tucker out to bark at possum that Hubs said he would get rid of; resume reading blogs

9:00- stop reading blogs, let Tucker in house; tell Tucker that is IT he is NOT going out anymore today; watch television

9:30- stop watching television and let Tucker out to bark at possum that Hubs said he would get rid of

9:45-10:00- stop watching television and let Tucker back in house.

10:00- begin journaling while Hubs watches television and Tucker sleeps.

10:05-Hubs begins snoring loudly; move to bedroom for journaling and television; Tucker jumps on bed and goes to sleep.  Finally. 

Now, while some of those times are somewhat approximate (trust me, there is very little exaggeration), there is a point here.  The dog rules my life.  A fact that is complicated by Hubs not doing what he says he’s going to do and my feeding the birds and not being able to resist photographing them.  Oh, and my enabling of Tucker’s squirrel obsession.  For example, I have been unable to use the long table for scrapbooking in the study because I placed said table under the window for Tucker to sit on and look for squirrels.  He got up there via one of our dining chairs that I put beside the table for him.  I have now moved the sofa under the window so I can make use of the long table.  It’s more comfortable for Tucky now.  See?  Enabler.  

Perhaps this routine of ours would be easier on me if I left the door open all day long.  But that’s not even a remote possibility in the low-country.  It’s too hot 9 months out of the year; too cold a couple of months; and, on the off chance that the weather is just right?  Well, that’s just an assurance that there will be flies, mosquitoes and gnats coming inside to annoy me WAY more than letting Tucky in and out five million times a day.  Every. Single. Day.  And so, for now, I will continue opening and closing the door for Tucker and listening to that man who lives here Hubs say he needs to get rid of that possum and install a doggie door.  Why?  Because, as Walter Cronkite used to say, "(And) that's the way it is."

30 comments:

  1. Tucker is all about 'me' isn't he? Geez. Haha. What a dog's life huh?

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  2. In our house the dogs are alone from 6 am to 6 pm inside during the week. Somehow on the weekend they have to be in and out a million times when were there. Does their bladders shrink on Friday nights. Sheesh.

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  3. Instead of shooting squirrels, I would have shot Tucker by now!

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  4. What a beautiful dog you have. Is he a miniature Schnauzer?
    My daughter wants us to get a dog so much. I am trying to wait until my boys are a little bit bigger.

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  5. Barb, I know, right? LOL

    Mrs. Tuna, according to my husband, it's because they can-ha!

    Eva, I know, but I don't because I am a huge part of the blame on this one!

    Rochelle, Tucker is a yorkie-poo and is the joy of our lives now that the girls have grown up!

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  6. Oh how I loved this post!
    When we looked after Ted in France it was like this - let Ted out, let Ted in, let Ted out...great post. Can I borrow Tucker please? We have squirrels who are driving us nuts (forgive the pun) they are horrible grey ones and Tucker would be ace at keeping them away from our bird feeder or at least scaring them a bit...they are clearly terrified of next door's tiny dog.
    Many thanks for your lovely comment on my last post again. Always delighted when you come by...it's like getting a visit from your best friend!

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  7. I too have dogs and I know the routine (well they don't like to chase squirrels quite as much as Tucker). But we love them, right? Perhaps too much, ha!

    Hugs,
    Jacalyn

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  8. Carol, you can borrow Tucker as long as I get to come over with him!

    Jacalyn- yes, we do love them TOO much!

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  9. I feel your pain! Jake can be alone all day and not have to go out, but when we are home, he always wants to go out!
    Loved the post!

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  10. You need to get Cesar Milan to come over there and whip your husband into shape...lol. That was hilarious. We have three dogs AND a dog door. I can't imagine letting them in and out all day long. Your story cracked me up.

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  11. That is just so funny. Blimey, I'm not sure that I could cope with all that!! That Tucker certainly rules the roost, doesn't he?! Bet he repays you tenfold though with his love. Really enjoyed reading this post.

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  12. I don't know who's more spoiled. Tucker or the Blog :D

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  13. So funny. I generally go out with Skye, I am way over protective of things that could hurt here. She loves to be outside but doesn't spend as much time as Tucker does.
    With the warmer weather the last few days the lizards have been out and she goes crazy over them. Sometimes I will take my computer to the kitchen table and let her out but I am also able to keep my eyes on here.

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  14. Thanks so much for the kind and humorous comments!

    Robin--that's an idea. At least it would be something pleasant to look at for a while. LOL

    Debby--I was like that for a long time. But the yard is fenced in and there are no holes for him to slip out through so I finally let him go alone. However, if he's out there for more than a few minutes I'm checking on him!

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  15. My wife is the one who has to let Buddy in and out every few minutes and it's all her fault. Every time the dog looks her was she asks "Do you need to go outside?" What Buddy hears is GO OUTSIDE!!! He then takes her hand in his mouth and leads her to the door.

    Meanwhile, all I have to deal with is a lap full of soggy tennis balls every few minutes. You see, Buddy is teaching me how to play Buddy Ball; I throw the ball, Buddy brings it back, I try to get it away from him, eventually get bored and give up, he dumps a soggy ball in my lap. I don't know where they're coming from but he now has at least 5 tennis balls....all soggy.

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  16. Oh My GOODNESS! I had the grandpuppy for the weekend and was worn out. Give me all the Grandkids..they are easy!

    Tucker, you are one lucky pooch that you have a SAHM!
    Shawn

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  17. I had forgotten the pleasures of having a dog indoors and a puppy at that!

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  18. I know that routine from the time when w are back in Hungary in our little Puzzle Palace :)
    I just make the times stretch a bit longer for letting them in or out :)
    And mine never would wait that long in the morning.
    How about a dog door 'in' the door?

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  19. Chip, we had a Buddy dog too. Ours was a golden retriever and we had him for 13 years before cancer got him. He was such a sweetie. Our DD2's chocolate lab and DD1's mix are infamous for dumping the soggy tennis balls in our laps. Ewwww...LOL

    Shawn, the puppy is so cute!

    Gail, is the best thing EVER!

    Nicole, Hubs has been saying he's going to put in a doggie door for about a year now so I figure, based on his track record, that we have another 3+ years to wait. LOL

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  20. What a little cutie he is! And I bet he looks up at you with big round eyes if you don't want to let him out!!

    I love this post. It made me really smile!

    Sarahx

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  21. Awards season is upon us, Golden Globe, Oscars and the 'Versatile Blogger' award.
    I would like to pass on the 'Versatile Blogger' award to you. You have a lovely blog and I feel you are very worthy of this award. Details of what to do are on my blog....
    Helen x (its a nice green award too!)
    http://acraftykindoftruffle.blogspot.com

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  22. Love the post! Tucker is such a cutie and certainly has you well trained :)

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  23. This is why I don't have a dog! I spend enough time taking myself to the bathroom.

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  24. LOL. Don't ya just love it! I wouldn't trade these dogs for anything. My cousin gave me a sign to hang on my wall, 'Daily Schedule: Let dog out; let dog in; let dog out; let dog in; let dog out;...'

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  25. Oh.... like the Possum ;)
    Right....
    Maybe you should do a 'Do it yourself' crash course?
    ;-)

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  26. Love the post!

    Hope you have a wonderful weekend . . . Gina

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  27. Sara, he does look at me like that! And, I let him out.

    Susan, that's what my step-mom always tells me!

    Grams- LOL

    Cranberry- I've seen t-shirts with that printed on them...living the dream, right? LOL

    Nicole- LOL

    Gina- Thanks so much!!

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  28. Hi I thought it was about time I officially followed you both here and on FB :) Thankyou so much for the recent comment on LindyLouMac's Book Reviews.

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  29. Lindy- Thank you! I really appreciate it! And, you are quite welcome!

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  30. Too funny, and I can totally relate! Sometimes we wonder if we are the ones training our dogs, or if our dogs are training us!

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Thank you so much for taking the time to comment! It makes me feel connected to everyone even though we may live far apart! Have a wonderful day!

 
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