Monday, May 27, 2013

Monday Listicles--Planning a Wedding

It's Memorial Day and a day off from school! Which means we are now down to only 9 school days left before summer vacay! WHAT?! WooHoo!

Monday also means Monday Listicles and THIS Monday marks Stasha's 100th listicle post! 

This week's list is all about free styling it! NEXT week the list will be The Top 10 Things You Notice About People.

All you have to do to join in with this week's list is click on the button! 

10 Tips for Empty Nesters on How to Keep Positive While Planning a Wedding
  1. Regarding the money. Everything is overpriced. EVERYTHING. I swear it's a scam. But, so what? It's your daughter's wedding. It's going to cost money. AND, sometimes, the cost of something won't be near as much as you thought it would be! 
  2. Tap into family and friend resources. There will be some who want to help- let them! With the understanding that this is your daughter's wedding so it's all about what SHE wants. If they want to do it their way instead- tell them NO.
  3. The waiting sucks. We went out for the first time to get ideas for the bridesmaids dresses and start trying on wedding dresses. Which means we did a lot of waiting. All. Day. Long. BUT- if you take sisters/BFFs/relatives with you, you get to focus on the stories, smiles, laughter and tears instead of how long it's taking.
  4. When you feel the need to vent, (you know, when your daughter wants something that horrifies you or a vendor totally pisses you off) do it with your Bestie (some of you might be lucky enough to have a husband willing to help in this area) or a close relative--someone who will keep it between the two of you. NEVER vent to/at your daughter!
  5. Remember, you want to be the one your daughter can turn to for support NOT the one she runs away from because of your negativity.  
  6. Remember that it's all about HER and HER day. Not yours. You had your chance YEARS ago. 
  7. Don't let the list of things to do freak you out. Even though it may seem like there aren't enough hours in the day, there are! Everything will get done and it will all be well worth it!
  8. Look forward to and totally immerse yourself in the wonderful girls' weekends you will host. Remember, if you are being all negative and controlling, you won't get to enjoy anything because they'll leave you out of as much as they possibly can.
  9. Remember, it's just a wedding. If you start feeling overwhelmed/stressed/negative/angry---STEP BACK and regroup. 
  10. Make up your mind that every single thing that goes into the planning is going to be fun and then embrace each task/meeting/event as such. 
Gotta give a shout out to BELLA BRIDESMAIDS (downtown Charleston, SC) and BRIDALS BY JODI (North Charleston, SC) for being so sweet and helpful and just downright wonderful! 

AND- Birdie found her dress! We had appointments at four different places (waitingwaitingwaiting) - she found two fantastic choices for bridesmaids dresses at Bella Bridesmaids and then, at our last stop of the (long) day, she found THE dress (thank you so much Betsy at Bridals by Jodi). 

See what a positive attitude can result in at the end of the day? 


  1. Hi Pam. Sounds as if you've had an exciting weekend. Oh how wonderful that Birdie found THE dress. That really is a weight off the shoulders! You have put together a really good list of advice there on how NOT to get too stressed out about everything. As you say, positivity in all things, otherwise you are going to be left behind. Although I'm sure no=one would dare to leave Pam behind!!! I'm very excited for you and all the family my friend.

  2. When is the wedding? You have a good list. I guess I am not over the work yet. It just hits to close to home right now.
    I think the other things is just have lots and lots of fun.
    It is a great list and I wish I had it before I started.
    Are you feeling better?

  3. Great list and I hope I can remember it when it's our turn. (But hopefully, not for a couple of years yet.)

  4. Excellent advice & I'm glad my daughter is only 9!!!

  5. My bowling buddy is going through the same thing you are right now with planning a wedding! We planned a wedding in 3 1/2 weeks that looked like it was planned well in advance. It was so lovely and perfect. What I liked about it was that decisions had to be made quickly!

  6. Great attitude and great list.
    It's a privilege for a mother to be part of the mother had passed away when i got married, and I felt lonely once again when I read this post. So I say, enjoy every minute of it!
    Delighted the shopping went so well :)

  7. A great positive attitude. I know some brides who could have used this list.
    I wasn't one though - my mom got lucky in the planning. she had many ideas....I didn't care at all. just tell me where and when to show up.
    Except the dress -- that was my decision. And the music. other than that, I let her do it. She was in heaven.

  8. Awesome advice and I was blessed with a mother that followed those steps,now I hope to do the same thing someday.
    Lucy from Lucy's Reality

  9. Why is it that people think they have an input when they don't even put a dollar in for the wedding? hmmmmm
    good luck and take it all in.

  10. Diane- It was exciting. And exhausting. But the fun outweighed the exhaustion and the whole thing with me being sick. She found it at the very last place we went. You just never know- these things can take way longer but she got lucky. Sometimes I wish they’d leave me behind. LOL

    Kim- The wedding is May 10, 2014. I put the list out there for those empty nesters who are, shall we say…controlling? LOL I think you are more like me and make sure our daughters get what they want!
    Cathy- It’s really easy: just make it about them!

    Debby- It’s all about time management. Well, that and making sure bossy people stay out of it. LOL

    Mimi- I am enjoying it! It’s our second wedding and the main thing I’ve learned is how to keep the cost down. Yay! Not pushing my opinions is easy as I have none when it comes to weddings. LOL

    Rory- My mother sounds like yours- she would love to step in and do it all. Not me. I am not into all the falderal at all. So, I just make sure the lovelies get what they want! That’s the easy part! If one of my girls wanted me to take over control I would freak out! YIKES! LOL

    Lucy- You will! You’re like me, you want her to have HER wedding not yours.

    Kelly- I don’t know why they do it but they’ve never been allowed to do it at one of the lovelies’ weddings. I’ve been able to keep those types at bay during the first wedding and this one. I don’t mind telling people where to get off so I almost hope they will try something. LOL

    Kenya- Thanks! Time management is one of my BFFs. LOL

  11. Great list! #4 is definitely key! The bride already has enough to deal with.

  12. Think I will share with a friend who is facing a bridezilla daughter at the moment!

  13. Great advice for others in your position!

    I had to chuckle at "You had your chance YEARS ago" - it's funny how some moms want to recreate their wedding fantasies through their daughters.

    Happy Listicles Monday!

    Yona from

  14. I am so glad to have found you! My second/last child graduated high school this weekend, and while I know that I am probably a few years yet from true empty nest, I know that life won't be the same. This list, by the way, is GREAT! Such wisdom!


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