Thursday, July 25, 2013

Are Y'all Familiar With Frustration?

I was an empty nester for four years. I had gotten to the place where I quite enjoyed my empty nest. And, as I was warned, someone moved back home.

Don't misunderstand. This isn't a bad thing. I'm totally serious when I tell the lovelies that this will always be their home. It will be. And, if I ever move, wherever that is will be their home. There is never a time that one of them will ever be turned away. That's just silly to even think about.

Not that is hasn't been an adjustment (again) but, having one of the lovelies home has been fun. We've enjoyed being together and talking and laughing. We go places together, watch really is fun. She's funny and fun; always on the go; a great conversationalist; energetic; enthusiastic; mostly in a good many great and wonderful things about having a daughter move back home.

However (because there's always a 'but'), there is a down side.

Is it my loss of privacy all day? Nope
Is it the loss of quiet, solitude? Nope.
Is it the loss of only cooking for two (which I had FINALLY gotten the hang of)? Nope.

Do y'all remember the room that we redecorated in November last year?

The one that looked like this and gave us HELL to redo (you can read about it HERE if you'd like)?

But that ended up looking like this:

And then I painted the furniture that my parents had when I was growing up and put it in there and then Birdie move back for five months?


Well, here's what it looks like now:

Now, I'm not a neat freak per se though I could be described as neat freak-ISH. But this is driving me NUTS!

My stress level has increased because, even though the door is kept closed, I KNOW what lies beyond. And it's SCARY! And, yes, we had that talk before she moved back in. You know, the one about how things can't be all messy like when she was in high school and how much keeping things neat and clean reduce my stress level and all that? Yeah, that one.

I suppose you could call me a Martha and DoodleBug a Mary. But, then, what do you call her father--from whom she gets this messy gene?

Oh they know how to smell the roses. And drink the coffee. And read the paper. And talk and visit and go.

I guess I'm always a Martha because the Mary and the man leave me no other alternative. I don't dare leave it- I've tried that. Things just pile up more. And more.

Just remember, if you don't see or hear from me in a while, I've either left town or I went in that room and got eaten. :)

Tell me your story of a kid moving back into the nest.


  1. I hear you loud and clear. I do know the frustration. Sorry about the way the room looks and OMG I would love to smell the roses, have coffee, read, talk, visit and go.....

    When our daughter and SIL moved in I was concerned about the next being full again. Then we all settled in and things ran smoothly. We had a live in sitters for Skye when we traveled. I love them but 3 years in the tension is building and heads are spinning. It makes me so sad because our relationships are suffering now. Breaks me to pieces.

  2. Debby- Three years. Wow. I can see how the tension could build. DoodleBug has only been here three months and I'm about as tense as I can be. LOL Well, sort of LOL. :)


  4. I won't laugh because I know the feeling all too well :)

    Lucy from Lucy's Reality

  5. Haha, I had to laugh because you see mine is now married and gone is that room in my house. The boys are if anything neat freaks so my upstairs is clean and orderly.
    It does look like a explosion went off in your house. Yep, I remember the stress I felt because I knew what was behind the door. I guess just keep the door closed. :)

  6. Kim- Right?!

    Lucy- Oh go ahead. I have to try and do it just to keep from crying. :)

    Kim- I keep it closed. I'm scared Tucker might get lost in there. Ha! It's driving me NUTS. NUTS!

  7. My story is a little different, since I got my boys when they were 16 and 20 (married their dad). The youngest kept things picked up, but you could plant corn on the furniture; the oldest, just home from college, had to walk on boxes and clothing to get to his bed. Joe told me to just close the doors. The boys were supposed to be responsible for their rooms, so I left it to them. Made me shudder, but I left it to them. :)

  8. Terri- I'm doing the same thing. But it's NOT EASY. LOL

  9. Bless your heart. We are Marthas together. While two of my sons were away at college last year, I cleaned their rooms and reveled in the loveliness, well, they've been home for 2 months and it looks like landmines have exploded in their rooms. Oy vey!
    BTW, the room redo was lovely.

  10. Elizabeth- Thank you, I loved the way that room looked when I finished. Landmines---THAT'S IT! LOL

  11. I am horrible. Mine moved home so many times I changed the locks.

  12. All I can say is good luck. Ours are beyond that now, but it took a few years!

  13. Gnome- I'm not sure she will ever get out of it. Her dad is like that and so was his mother. His mother was the worst one of all. And then there's our oldest daughter who is better but not that much. LOL

  14. Ha! I love this! I am starting a Bible study .....being Mary in a Martha World.....that might not be the exact name, but close. Some days I'm not Mary OR Martha! Yikes!

  15. OMG! I could tell you stories but I don't want to piss off my step daughter!!!! She's married to a winner who likes guns!...:)JP

  16. I know how you feel. My daughter's moving back in and she's the same way. I assume there must be some kind of button that they can turn off at the back of their head so they don't see the mess. I need one too!

  17. ARE those gobstoppers in the trash can??? I LOVE THEM!! How sad, I know, pure sugar, but for some reason!!! .... And this looks like my sons room!!! Every August I call the exterminator when he leaves for college!!


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