Tuesday, February 18, 2014


Apparently, it doesn't matter how long the nest has been empty, someONE or someTHING is going to throw a wrench into my plans. And it's not because I don't plan. I do. It's THEM. THEY don't plan and then they need/want me to drop everything and jump right in.

I'm starting to resent these people.

It's like they're a bunch of monkeys- smart but not quite smart enough to be human. I guess I should be thankful that they're not like alligators lying in wait for the idiot to step out in the pond. No matter how old I get, how empty the nest gets, how grown up the kids get...someone is going to mess me up.

Oh, it's not just family. Work does it. Friends do it. Neighbors do it. Strangers do it. There seems to be no shortage of people who are more than willing to take my wonderfully planned day and rip it to shreds.

I live in an empty nest. This should not STILL be happening. I am supposed to be enjoying having my own agenda back with plenty of time to carry out everything on that agenda. Wrong.

Yes, yes. DoodleBug moved back in. But she's an adult now. She has no business messing up her mother's agenda. I gave up my personal agenda YEARS ago to devote myself full time to her and her sisters. On top of that is the fact that, no matter where they live- at home or far away- they still find a way to interrupt my flow. Harsh my agenda buzz.


It's no better at work. I have an agenda at work. There are small windows of time that I need to use for work agendas since I don't want my work agenda to interfere with my home agenda (see? I'm thoughtful enough to have separate agendas in separate places) but there are those who will walk right in and mess up my work agenda every day of the week. Every. Day.

And then there's the way my mind messes up my attempts at having an agenda. Thaaaat's riiiiight. I thwart my own efforts. Sheesh.

It comes down to this: Don't have kids. OR don't have a job. OR don't have a an agenda.

I was not that thrilled with the empty nest situation when it was first thrust upon me. But, after a time, I realized that I would be able to have the ability to have an agenda once again. Any agenda I wanted. That was one thing that might have helped me adjust to an empty nest. Until I tried to have one and realized that once you are 'mom,' you will always be mom.

And, at work, well, people do tend to try to be the best they can be and to make themselves indispensable. You know, for the sake of job security. And, maybe, because it's the way some of us just are.

I've gotten in the habit of doing for others over the years. Where, in my single, non-mothering years I had an agenda of my own every day and LOVED it, things changed when the lovelies came along. And now, doing for others is a habit.

I never minded doing for the lovelies. But, now that they're grown and gone and I'm still here, I thought I could return to those personal agenda days. Not. Going. To. Happen. And it's time to stop trying to have one and stop mentally resenting the offenders of the agenda and just accept the fact that those carefree days of my youth are gone. Spent. Over. Done. Sigh...

So tell me, have y'all returned to the carefree, personal agenda keeping days of old?


  1. Most of our kids and grandkids live soooo far away that we rarely see them, so they're certainly not affecting my agenda. :-((( But the dogs and cats are quite demanding.

  2. Our grand kids are 11/2hrs away as are the rest of the family, so we have our agenda and are able to enjoy it. However, when called upon in some small way, we change things up, give up the gym, tai Chi, even kayaking..it doesn't matter...life does!...:)JP

  3. I removed myself for my situation where there was no "I". It was me doing for everyone else. I moved and now I have an agenda and it's better than ever. You have to allow for "YOU". Love you lady!

  4. Love your honesty and I can totally relate. Having our daughter back for the last 4 years has not been easy!


Thank you so much for taking the time to comment! It makes me feel connected to everyone even though we may live far apart! Have a wonderful day!

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