Another Modicum of Idiocy

Since Birdie was coming home last weekend and it was the first time we'd left Tucker at home AND because we didn't want Mimi to have to stay any longer than necessary (she was granddog sitting Tucker for us)--whew!--the husband and I decided to drive home after staying at the wedding reception for a couple of hours. (That's right- you don't have to be young to do dumb things).

People who are used to being asleep by 10:00 at night probably shouldn't begin a 5 hour drive home at that time. But we did. And we used the GPS on my phone to do it.

If you can tell in the photo below, the directions highlighted in BLUE is the route the husband wanted to take. It's the way we usually travel home when we're in that general area of NC. Of course, we'd never started from this particular place in NC, but still. The directions highlighted in PINK is the route mapped out for us by my GPS. They make a nice oval shape, see? And there's less than 30 minutes difference between them in the amount of time it takes to arrive home.

Which would have worked out fine. If our brains had left well enough alone.

That first stretch of road in blue- that starts near Greensboro, NC? Yeah. That's called 73 S, 220 S AND 74 E. That's right. ONE road- THREE names. The husband was not amused. And it's sort of like a 4-lane back road. No lights-except the moon. No gas stations. No hotels/motels. Just farm land. Probably really pretty during the day. Oh, and no service---or, intermittent service. At best.

So, this road goes on FOREVER and I'm not getting service. The husband continues to not be amused. He is also not amused by the signs we are seeing as to which towns we'll be traveling through...eventually. Over to my side, meanwhile, I am quietly tapping the hell out of my phone (as if that will make service miraculously appear) and yelling at it in my head. Brilliant is what I am.

FINALLY, we spot a place to pull off- it's closed, but there is light.

The husband: "I don't think this thing is taking us in the right direction."
Me: "It's just not taking us home the way you're used to going."
The husband: "I think it's taking us WAY out of our way to get home."
Me: "I think you're letting your mind focus too much on the signs instead of just letting the GPS do it's thing."
The husband: "Fine. But I think it's a piece of crap." (He really did say crap. We had not yet entered the cursing phase).

He gets back on the road and we continue on.

When we finally hit civilization, the husband's lack of amusement intensifies. Greatly.

The husband: "What the fudge (no, he did not say fudge)?! We're in (explicative) ROCKINGHAM?!
Me: (crickets)
The husband: What the hell are we doing in (explicative) ROCKINGHAM?!
Me: (crickets- but thinking: What the hell are we doing in (explicative) ROCKINGHAM?!

Meanwhile, my phone is about to die. Yep. Insult to injury. Are you wondering why I didn't just plug in into the car charger? Well, I'll tell you why I didn't just plug it into the car charger. Because DoodleBug never returned the car charger when she borrowed it to go to All Good last summer THAT'S why. So I have to go in and out of the navigation app over and over again.

The husband wants to look at a 'real' map.

The husband: "I need to look at a map."
Me: "Ok, get one when you get coffee." (This is our first stop for coffee because, up until this point, there have been zero opportunities for coffee stoppage)
The husband: "I think there's one in the side pocket of the door."
Me: "Great." (thinking to myself--what year was it made?)

He looks at the map but says little to nothing. 

The phone GPS is still telling us to stay on the same road. We're going in the right direction. I tell this to the husband who replies with, "Hrmph." Or something like that. We continue. And we're back in the middle of nowhere. To turn around would mean going back at least an hour in the other direction.

We come to another civilized area and pull into a gas station. The husband wants to look at the map. Again. Because, you know, the roads might have changed since the last time he looked.

And it is decided that we will NOT continue as per the GPS instructions but, rather, go about 50 minutes off the track and then, now get this---right down to the very town that the GPS was sending us where we would take I-95 (which is a straight shot to I-26 which is a straight shot into Charleston).

See the map below? We were in Bennettsville and just needed to head straight down to Florence and hit I-95. He wants to go over to Dillion and THEN down to Florence.    

Guess who's cursing now?

Anyway, we made it home by 3:00 am. Which was only about an hour and a half later than we should have arrived. Of course, some of this is attributed to the 4 stops for coffee. And then the stops for letting the coffee out. And let me just say, once again, that it is totally unfair that guys can pee anywhere.

Tucker was delighted to see us. Mimi---well, she had been up at 3:00 am the previous morning welcoming Birdie home so....

I was up at 7:00 am to walk Tucker and make the breakfast that DoodleBug asked me to make in honor of Birdie's arrival.

You remember DoodleBug. The one who still has the phone charger for the car? Don't worry. We have a new one now. The husband bought it during a coffee stop so I could charge my phone. Just before we got on I-95. You know, just in case.

Friday Fragments

Don't have a lot of time? Then Friday Fragments is just what you need! Hop on over the Mrs. 4444's at Half-Past Kissin' Time and join in the fun!

Congrats to the high school graduates out there! Be ready y'all- college is a total BLAST!

• The wedding was big fun! Y'all can read about it here if you missed it. Though I have to say that traveling on a holiday weekend is not something I'd want to do again. Ever. 

•  Birdie made it home safe and sound. Evwardo flew out to Texas to drive back with her- I'm tellin' y'all, that one's a keeper! We had a welcome back sign put up at the entrance to our subdivision- it contains a little inside joke:

•  My very sweet friend sent me this in an email and I thought y'all would get a kick out of it:

• Deanie was able to come to NC for the weekend (she lives in DC) so we all stayed at my dad's house on Saturday. I love it when things work out like that!

• We had TWO birthdays this week! Both BestSonInLawEVER and my brother T had a birthday on Wednesday! T is way older than BestSonInLawEVER, aren't you T? Happy birthday fellas! Love y'all!

• My Tucky Poo doesn't travel well so Mimi (my mother) came down to stay with him while we went to the wedding. My aunt goes to lunch with a group of friends every Friday. This past Friday several of them weren't there. Guess where they were? Babysitting their grand-dogs! How funny! 

• Also funny- y'all know Joyce at From this Side of the Pond, right? Well, her DD2 was in a wedding in NC on Saturday. Guess where it was? At the exact same place of the wedding that we attended on Sunday!   

• Met the boy that DoodleBug is sort of dating a little bit on Monday. He seems quite nice. We'll see how he works out.

• Yesterday, Birdie and I went out to the IOP (the Isle of Palms) with the pooches. During certain hours, the dogs can run free without leashes! It's awesome and only 6 minutes away! I'll leave you with a few pix:

Here's Strider having a run after a swim:

Tucker prefers to have the run without the swim:

But Strider just swims and swims and swims:

While Tucker watches:

Sometimes there are holes that we can't see when we're in the water. And we fall. And we get wet. Like Birdie:

Tucker met a new friend who ran into the water. Tucker followed. But, as soon as he realized he was in the water, he came out. Speedy quick:
 

There was a random dude out there paddle boarding:

The water was gorgeous:

I could stand there all day and just look at it:

Yellow flowers abound on the dunes:

Another random doggie heading out for a swim. Or so we thought. As soon as he got to the water's edge, he stopped and headed back:

Quite a lovely way to begin a day:

Have a great weekend y'all!

Signs, Signs, Everywhere Signs

We had to drive 5 hours to attend the wedding on Memorial Day weekend. It was well worth the effort as a splendid time was had by all!

But, all along the way, I noticed so many signs. Of stupidity.

And not just where other drivers were concerned. The actual signs themselves were often stupid. Like the one there on the left.

Really? You have to tell people not to stop on the railroad tracks? Who doesn't know that you should NOT stop on the railroad tracks? Who doesn't know that the likelihood of getting hit by a train increases dramatically when you stop on the tracks? Who doesn't know that stopping on the tracks when a train is coming results in imminent death?

Seriously, I'm thinking that if someone is stupid enough to stop on the tracks....

And then there's the discussion between the husband and myself about the sign on the right over there.

The husband: "What the hell does that sign mean?"  
Me: "I believe it means slippery when wet."
The husband: "What, so the road is more slippery in this area than others when it's wet?"
Me: "Apparently so."
The husband: "I don't think that's what it means."
Me: "What does it mean then?"
The husband: (making 's' hand movements) "Don't drive like this."
Me: "You mean swervey?"
The husband: "Yeah. I mean, what else could it mean?"
Me: "Uh, Slippery When Wet."

I think I'm beginning to understand why they make a sign that reads, "DO NOT STOP ON TRACKS"

What I learned while on the 5 hour road trip to the wedding:

1. There are ZERO decent radio stations once you leave the Charleston area. Thank God for iPods.
2. The DOT (Department of Transportation) does not give a rat's a$$ about the gazillion pot holes and sizable cracks on I-26. 
3. Playing the license tag game is no fun without the lovelies there to play along.
4. The husband drives like we're in a car that's part of a video game being driven by a 14 year old boy.
5. Next trip will require Valium. Or a plane ticket.
6. It is DUMB to travel on a holiday weekend. 
7. Women miss the hole in the toilet in public restrooms. How that is humanly possible I have no idea but they do. And it's disgusting. If I wanted urine on my toilet seat, I would go into the men's room. 
8. The husband's driving is 100 times worse if he needs to use the restroom.
9. There is no sense in yelling at the GPS in your phone. It does not listen. I'm guessing that, even though the voice on that thing sounds like a female, there's actually a man in there. 
10. The only thing I miss about living in the upstate is the way the Kudzu looks hanging off the trees. 

Tips to a few certain people:

1. If you own a gas station near the interstate, you really should: A. Keep it clean (Not a single restroom we stopped at was clean); B. Have more than one stall in the women's room; C. Keep the toilet paper stocked; D. Have the towel option for drying hands---that blow dryer is stupid; E. Make sure the toilet seats are not broken-particularly if you insist on only having one stall in the women's room; F. Make sure the locks on the doors work; G. Make sure you have hooks on the doors for women to hang their purses/coats/whatever.
2. To the lady in front of us at Subway: Low calorie subway subs lose their low calorie status when you keep saying to the lady--with regards to the mayo--"More...more...more..." until you have about half a freaking bottle of the stuff on your sub. 
3. To the DOT: Fix the damn holes and cracks.
4. To the people in the fast lane: When the slow guy in front of you moves to the slow lane, that is your cue to speed up or move to that lane with him.
5. To the young girl in the red car: Just because you're young doesn't mean you have to be stupid.
6. To the guy in the gray truck: When the thought of changing lanes pops into your pea brain suddenly and without provocation, you should LOOK before you ACT. Moron.
7. To the DOT, again: At one point we were on ONE road. It's name was (and I kid you not)- 73 South, 74 East, 220 South. We were on one road with three names traveling in two directions. Not funny. Make up your mind.
8. To myself: no more watching of the Final Destination movies if that's all you can think of when you pass a logging truck.
9. To the DOT (yep, one more time): Why can't we have pretty flowers in the medians on SC roads like they do in NC? If we're going to have to suffer with the roads being in treacherous conditions at least we can enjoy the scenery. 

There will be more about the trip home soon...stay tuned---

Did you travel over the holiday weekend? Or did you play it smart and stay at home?

Hump Day HOPS!

Wednesday has arrived again and that means it's time for the HOPS! Click on the buttons below to join in the fun! Come on! It's too dang hot to go outside anyway!

1. What can the average citizen do to honor a military veteran and/or those currently serving? I've never really thought about this. When I was in elementary school I would send cards to those serving in Vietnam. I got several back telling me how much they appreciated them.

2. Besides a flag what is something you own that is red, white and blue? Nothing. I purposely avoid clothes that are red, white and blue. On July 4th I wear white pants with a red and blue shirt but I don't wear red, white and blue any other time.

3. Does love really conquer all? I doubt it. But it sure makes it easier.

4. Strawberry shortcake or blueberry pie? Strawberry shortcake! Yummy!

5. Do you share personal stuff with your hairdresser? I don't have a hairdresser. They are too expensive down here- to get your hair highlighted is nearly $200! A cut and style- $80. No thank you. 

6. Does money lead to selfishness? It doesn't have to. Maybe it depends on whether or not the person is just naturally selfish. Some people are selfish and have no money at all. Most of the people I know who have money---wait a second...I don't know any people with money. So I have no idea. LOL

7. What piece of furniture in your home most needs replacing or refinishing? I have a favorite chair that needs to be reupholstered. Everyone loves this chair and it's starting to show. Then there's the chair that used to belong to my MIL- it needs to be reupholstered. But I've already taken care of the refinishing projects.

8. Insert your own random here. The wedding was big fun! You can see pictures here. And Birdie is all moved back in here at home! She will stay with us for a couple of months before moving into her own place. Guess who's tickled pink about that?!

QUESTIONS

1. Do you have any musical instruments in your house? If so, which ones do you have? No, the lovelies took their instruments when they moved into their own houses. Wait! We do still have some percussion instruments. Some are antiques and some are from Africa. But the piano, cello and drum set are gone. Guess which one I don't miss? LOL WAIT! I forgot the husband's guitars and Dobro! Oops!
2. When you take a walk, what are you likely to pick or pick up from the ground? Nothing. I used to pick up Tucker's poo while walking over at the ponds but, since they started constructing monsters of the new home sort, I no longer pick it up.
3. They say to have breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a pauper. I guess that means you have fuel for your body to get through the day and don't have a full tummy when you go to bed. Are your meals like that? Not really. I got in the habit of making dinner the 'king' meal because that's when we were all here and sitting at the table together. This summer, however, I think we are going to go RAW just to check it out. So, every meal will be extremely healthy but light. I just felt like summer would be a good time to try it out.
4. Do you prefer iced coffee or iced tea? Didn't even have to think a millisecond on this one- iced tea. I am southern, after all.
5. How do you handle doing things you'd rather not do? It all depends. If it's something that doesn't necessarily HAVE to be done at all, I just skip it. If it's something that HAS to be done, I dive in and do it right away/first thing to get it over with. I can't stand things like this to hang over my head. 

I'm going to catch up reading your blogs today! Traveling over the weekend put me way behind! Have a great Wednesday y'all!

The Wedding!

We're back from the wedding weekend and I'm finally ready to share it with y'all. It takes me so long to go through the pictures I take because I take way too many! Then I have to weed through them all and edit them and them pick just a few to share. This may be easy for some of you. But not for me.

Anyway, I just want to share some pictures today. The particulars of the trip are for a later post.

The wedding was 5 hours away at the Castle McCulloch in Jamestown, NC. Apparently, they host loads of weddings there.

You might recognize Hubs and Breezy---every picture I took of BestSonInLawEVER turned out blurry :(

The bride is BestSonInLawEVER's youngest sister--- here she is with their dad---

Everyone was so happy- the picture below pretty much sums up the general atmosphere of the wedding---

Taking her vows---

This is the other sister- she is my favorite Penrod---shh!!! Don't tell the others!

Getting tagged...I mean, the rings---

A little kissy--

The Dr. and Mrs.---

Yummy cake! I did not have any, but it looked wonderful!

BestSonInLawEVER's parents! Isn't his mother gorgeous?! They are just about the nicest, sweetest people on earth!

First dance---

Looks like love---

Of course there was dancing---far left is the bride, then her sister, then their dad---

How low can you go?!

 It's not a wedding without the electric slide!

They slid right on through the night!

We had a fabulous time! At the wedding. The trip home---well, that's for another post.